I'm scared

If you want a way to spend your day that does not involve me
I'd be quite pleased to up and leave and keep your diary free
But if you're so keen to be seen about with me
We could go to a zoo or a pub or two and get on famously

But please don't hit me - I'm a pacifist
Don't want to feel intimidated
Don't want to feel your fist
Please don't hit me - I'm aggressively impaired
And please don't hit me just because I'm scared
I am scared

You say you've got a bone to pick, you think that I'm your man
But you've got me muddled with my double or maybe with my Nan
Don't think it's fair that you'd dare to pick a fight with me
You ask my view on hospital food, well at least it's free

But please don't hit me - I'm a pacifist
Don't want to feel intimidated
Don't want to feel your fist
Please don't hit me - I'm aggressively impaired
And please don't hit me just because I'm scared
I am scared

I'd rather be quite friendly but you seem to have some doubts
I'd rather kick a ball 'bout a bit than have my brains kicked out
Please don't hit me

Please don't hit me - I'm a pacifist
Don't want to feel intimidated
Don't want to feel your fist
Please don't hit me - I'm aggressively impaired
And please don't hit me just because I'm scared
I am scared

© Belinda Carbuncle

Slim Paul says: He's not as bad as he used to be. Scarcely a gibber these days. I've still got Jim's CDs but he's got Steve's jacket.

Slick Nick says: None of our songs are very good. Some of them are particularly bad. Bin night is Mondays now.

Slim Steve says: Errr, sorry.